Romance tips one - recognizing your soulmate

"Romance tips one" will make it very easy for you to recognize your soul mate, perhaps in the first few minutes of meeting.

Here at "Romance tips one" you will learn how to identify their mannerisms at a glance.

This behavioral style information divides everyone into just four separate personalities. The first tip to know is that if you can talk and listen easily to the other person you are probably soul mates that have met naturally which has always happened when people fall in love.

You can find out why below.

To make it easier, "Romance tips one" covers one half of the four behavioral styles and Romance tips two covers the other half.

First you will identify your own style, then you will use the give-away mannerisms of the other personalities to recognize your soul mate from a group.

This page "Romance tips one", explains all about half of your personal behavioral style.

Behavioral styles

Your soul mate will be one of the four behavioral styles - a specific one, but you will not have to analyze everyone to find out because you will learn the short cuts which makes it easy especially when you are in a crowd.

This "Romance tips one" concerns the first half of those four styles which is

"Willingness to disclose personal information"

Some people like to be open and have little trouble disclosing personal information which they believe is being friendly. This is one end of the scale called "disclosing", while at the opposite end of the scale people are more guarded about sharing personal information and so they are "non disclosing".

The two ends of the scale are "disclosing" and "non disclosing".

Which one do you think you are?

How to tell

The first thing to know is that each end of the scale, either "disclosing" or "non disclosing" will talk and listen freely with each other, but the two styles do not cross communicate easily so if you find conversation is difficult or just not flowing with another person it is unlikely that they will be the same as you on the scale of "willingness to disclose personal information".

It is not because they do not like you so do not take it personally.

You see, the things each end of the scale talk about are just not the same and this is to blame for a lot of frustration when someone is very attracted to another, but they just cannot seem to get through to them.

For instance Disclosing people like to talk about emotions and feelings and personal things, which non disclosing people do not like to speak about.

Non disclosing people like to chat about goals, high achievement, sport, success, facts, but not personal feelings. Disclosing people talk about what they "think", while open people talk about what they "feel".

So if you find talking is difficult with a new acquaintance then there is a good chance that one of you is disclosing and the other is non disclosing.

It is not because you are not attractive.

The chances of that romantic partnership working out between a disclosing and a non disclosing person is poor. Even shy people who are of the same disclosure type can make good conversational progress so if you cannot then it is more likely that you are the opposite.

So the first of the great romance tips for attraction is that if you can talk and listen easily to the other person you are well on your way because you will be the same end of the scale for "disclosing".

It is a great sign.

It means that you are both speaking of similar things, or more correctly, you are both speaking in the same style. So you can tell different stories in a way that both of you appreciate and enjoy.

To expand on that a little, talking and listening easily is not just talking and listening. It involves the other person’s body language and their reactions too.

Listening is still communicating

If you are the listener, then what the other person says will either make you feel relaxed or tense.

You can actually talk easily to someone and not have them say much in return if they are comfortable listening.

It is when they become more uncomfortable the more you talk that you probably have an opposite style in disclosure to yours. Unfortunately this can sometimes take a while to work out or it can be obvious a few minutes after meeting, but at least you now have the clue.

"Romance tips one" will determine first of all what your own personal disclosure value is and by listening to as many people as you can you will be able to practice determining theirs.

Pay attention to their willingness to disclose personal information.

I have worked with some non disclosing people for years and not know their children or spouse's name, yet I can talk reasonably well with them - and with very disclosing people I have found out their family background, their personal history, where they go for holidays and how they feel about many things on the first day.

Look for how they talk about things - disclosing people talk with feelings and emotions while non disclosing people talk with factual and success orientation?

Look for ease of conversation - does it flow or is it short and clipped?

If it flows you are probably the same style which is great, if it does not, it is a strong indication that you will always have problems communicating. That is not good for a perfect love match as we explained in earlier pages.

Communication is the biggest key.

If you immediately communicate easily and comfortably that is the best sign of mutual attraction. If you continue to communicate in the same way then it is almost certain that you are the same style of disclosure and you are attracted to each other in general.

It sounds simple and it is, so you can see that it is not always wise to chase someone with whom you do not have a natural affinity.

They will almost always be an opposite style.

How to practice identifying disclosing and non disclosing personalities

First decide which end of the scale you are at to become better at determining whether a prospective partner is the same style.

Here is a question to help you.

Are you happy divulging your personal details to others in an attempt to be friendly and make them feel comfortable? If you answer Yes you are definitely disclosing on the scale of willingness to disclose information.

If you answer "No, or, only sometimes", or "Only after a while",you are most likely non disclosing on the same scale. Out of your best friends, most will be the same style as you.

Try to take notice of how easily you talk to work colleagues, acquaintances and strangers. Work out which of them you find annoying and whether they talk in terms of personal feelings or facts.

Then figure out which of them you get along with the easiest and try to determine their style because those little practices will help you determine your style.

When you are sure of your style and you have picked the style of many others you can practice guessing with people you meet for the first time.

It does not matter if they are the same or the opposite gender.

The first hot tip is to make sure you are able to communicate with a potential soul mate.

Things will go much more smoothly when you can and they will probably be your correct soul-mate behavioral style for true romance. When you get to Romance Tips Three, you will be shown a way that you can increase your confidence remarkably and quickly so that meeting people will become easy and you will be relaxed.

But now go to Romance Tips Two and find out about the second part of behavior styles and their mannerisms.

Return from Romance Tips One to the Home page