Afraid that you may have chosen the wrong love match?

If you have fears that you may have chosen the wrong love match, then you have come to the right site because you will be shown how to use an energy technique to unravel your anxiety and discover what to do about it.

Why do you think you are afraid? The first thing you have to do is to use these following ideas to separate the real reason or reasons that you are concerned, then work on each one to see what you can do about it using the techniques below.

What are you afraid of:

That you will be treated badly?

Why, what is so bad about that? (This is just to get to the real reason behind it) e.g. if you say "pain" or "misery" for life with the wrong love match, what is the worst part about that? Are you afraid of pain, wouldyou not fight back, ring the police or leave? What is the real reason behind it?

If you say "misery living with the wrong love match" then what does that mean - being dominated and not having any freedom, or having to starve and wear old clothes which your friends would be disgusted at?

Are you afraid of your partner not being faithful if you choose the wrong love match? What is the worst part of that, is it humiliation, that he/she may be laughing at you?

Could you be afraid of confrontation, or embarrassment or not having any prestige, or not having any control?

Use this method to try to get to the bottom of your fears,

Every time you come up with an answer add "Why?", after it until you have gone through about five Whys. This way you will get to the real reason behind feeling uncomfortable about choosing the wrong love match.

Here is an example of 5 whys.

Say you are afraid of your partner being unfaithful.

Why 1 because that would mean I was stupid,

Why 2 because being stupid is the worst thing,

Why 3 because I have been laughed at before for being stupid and it hurts,

Why 4 because I would be ashamed to show myself at work or in the community,

Why 5 because I would be criticized by everyone and I would feel like the lowest idiot unable to counter the attacks.

So the last "why" - 'feeling like an idiot with no defense' will be the first place to start the energy patting technique (links below). Then go on to the other "why" reasons one at a time from 4 to 3 to 2 and then 1.

You may have guessed by now that this is self-analysis because you can do something about yourself, but it is very difficult to change someone else and before you make a big mistake in your relationship you need to consider if your feelings are caused by your own beliefs - just a possibility worth exploring.

Are they your problems or your partner's?

What if you had a deep fear of something such as 'uncertainty' because something happened to you early in your life that is always in the back of your mind and this is the real cause of your feelings about your wrong love match?

If you could get rid of that fear completely you might reconsider your feelings, and if you did that and still felt the same then at least you would be more certain that it was your partner's fault and maybe there is not much you can do about it.

Being afraid has many aspects that you need to separate

You will have to write them down in a list and then pat through the list. It may even be possible that you are afraid because of some influences in your life which have nothing to do with your love match. Or it may be the behavior of your love match that is causing you to feel anxious about them being the wrong love match.

These are all aspects that have to be worked on separately. If you have not already gone through "Romance Tips Three" to introduce yourself to the patting technique you can go there now at Patting Technique. If you need a refresher on how to do

a round you can find it here at Patting Round. Or if you just need to

go over the patting points again you can see those at Patting Points. Your setup phrase for each one will be "Even though I am afraid of ....., I accept myself anyway." Those of you who are already experienced at patting will be able to make up your own. Follow the instructions for patting contained in the above links and you will be able to rid yourself of your fear and anxiety around the wrong love match.

The Soul Mate Test may give you clues to decide if you are with the wrong love match

If the answer is a strong "no" then you will find it difficult to communicate properly and that could be your problem. Without satisfactory communication you can easily become suspicious of their true love for you which raises doubts and fears. Those may be true or completely false. By removing your fears however, your mind becomes clearer and you are able to make better decisions about your situation.

For the best outcome you should use the links to Patting Central below to remove your own fears and boost your own confidence because if you are not confident then your love match may dominate you more than normal which would make you feel uncomfortable.

Once you are more confident and you have removed your fears about your relationship you will see exactly what to do and you will have no doubts about doing it which of course might be staying with your love match and enjoying it.

Return to Patting Central.

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